New year, same old me, or not?

on new year memories, resolutions & rituals

a picture that has nothing to do with this post

A few years back, at the age when my problems in life could easily be solved by my parents, I used to be so excited for New Year’s Eve. After stuffing myself with rice and meat and chin-chin and malt during Christmas and enjoying the slow-paced nature of the season, New Year’s Eve approached as another day to get excited over.

In the mornings and at night, the weather was cold in that way that’s distinct to Harmattan during the Christmas holiday in Nigeria. So when I and my family went for crossover services, I’d put on my pink hoodie or my purple and grey striped hoodie.

During the services, there was usually a bonfire where we’d throw in prayer requests we wrote on paper. The whole thing was a thrill for me. Staying up till midnight was so exciting and I loved watching the fireworks as the mix of colours burst on the black canvas of the night sky. It always felt like a good way to start the year.

Another thing I remember is setting New Year resolutions too. They usually looked like this:

1. Shower twice a day (this was very important and made my list every year from around ages 8-13)

2. Make a study timetable and stick to it

3. Study every day and revise my notes after each class

4. Read my bible every day (in the hopes that I’d finish the entire thing hahaha)

5. And so many more like this that I can’t remember

From this list, you can already deduce the studious and diligent child I was. But at the end of the day, I was deeply unserious because what are these resolutions? Lmao.

The consistency with which these plans fell through, year after year, was amazing. Regardless of this, I made resolutions religiously.

Now, unfortunately, life has squeezed out so much of the excitement I used to have for the new year that I’m like a toothpaste tube that has been flattened out for the last drop. I’m barely enthusiastic now, except if a year was particularly shitty and I can’t wait for it to end.

I can’t remember the last time I went for a crossover service, or even stayed awake till midnight. This time, I fell asleep about thirty minutes before 2024. And though I still think fireworks are pretty, I’m not as invested in seeing them anymore. And those knockouts or bangers or whatever they’re called, get me so annoyed. Why is it so loud?

I also don’t make New Year resolutions anymore. I’ve adopted the view that I don’t need to wait for a new year for a clean slate and an opportunity to start over. I can have that with every new morning or even every new breath.

But because I still want to be intentional, I did some journalling on my word for the year (which is trust) and what I want the year to be like (filled with ease, peace, joy, abundance, etc.) and I made a lot of lists. Lists are fun.

I made a gratitude list for 2023, a list of places I want to visit, publications I want to write for, projects I want to start and things I want to do if there were no obstacles and money was just a concept, and it felt nice. I did everything on the 28th so I could sleep peacefully on the 31st night.

In all of this, I’ve discovered that the pressure to unveil a new me on January 1st is gone and I don’t feel the urge to write resolutions like I used to.

However I’d still like to create a New Year ritual that’s personal to me, caters to my needs and gives me joy. I’ll keep experimenting and eventually find what works for me.

That’s it! Did you set New Year resolutions as a child? Do you remember them? Do you have any New Year rituals? Let me know in the comments or reply to this email :)

Happy New Year! (Because we have to keep saying that until like August) And I wish you a year filled with things, experiences, and people who give you joy ✨